For many of my followers...I'm sorry I never wrote this here! I have a new blog....

http://www.lightineightblueeyes.blogspot.com

The first post I wrote will explain why I changed spots and the meaning of my new blog name. Sorry I took so long to get this info on here!

On a Thursday...

      These days have been full of good things. Thrift store finds galore, good food, sunny skies and quiet rains, beautiful kids, early morning quiet times, David Nevue radio on Pandora...lots of good. In order to keep this photo full post as short as possible...small explanations for all of the *specialness.*
...A beautiful framed photo of a waterway in Martha's Vineyard...somewhere I've always wanted to go. Now I can look up on my wall and dream a little - and it's an actual photo...not some Wal Mart mass market print.

 ...a globe for 3 dollars for a little boy who has about 6 different models on his amazon wish list. He's been saving his allowance for one...so his mama surprised him and he can keep his quarters for some future purchase. :)

 ... a wooden cradle for a little girl that's been talking about needing a bed for her "babies" forever. "Oh mama" she said "you made my dreams come true." Be still my heart...

 ...6 wooden bowls for our start of filtering out the plastic in our lives. 49 cents each... can't beat that.

 ...little helpful boys, walking in line carefully balancing bowls of water...

 .... watering our little garden patch and living the good life in their undies and overalls. Thank you God for little boys.

 ...after months of being gluten free, a splurge with homemade cinnamon rolls and cream cheese and honey spread - I had four happy chubby cheeked kids on my hands, and that's how I like it.

 ... and then just as delicious but gluten free, Sweet Potato maple muffins, a yummy snack and enough for tomorrow's breakfast. :) Keeping ahead...and that's DEFINITELY the way I like it. :)

 ... reading together on the couch, the kids talking about all the places they will go someday on road trips, Brady encouraging Trinity as she tries to read the different names of the States.

 ...yummy lunches and fresh fruit. I redid my things in the cabinet to clear and also backed it in fabric to add a little bit of color and homeyness. I love the quilts in their and my white dishes, and it helped clear some space up in the kitchen.

 ... cool evenings and sunshine through my new wind chime from Zac. It makes me happy and that's why he got it - love my man.

 ...a robin chose to build her nest right outside of Trinity's window...we are careful not to press our face on the glass or be to loud. She never leaves them. What a wonderful opportunity to watch nature right here in the city! God is good to us.

 ...leaves. Need I say more?

 ...warm enough days to hang out our laundry and they are dry in 2 hours or less. Here's hoping for a lower electric bill this month.

 ... splashing and twirling.

...warm towels waiting and a swaying porch swing to enjoy a cup of tea or joe...depending on the mood.

 I've been happy. The ol' body is playing some tricks on me and that's been hard on my mood...but God centers me and my family loves me. I try to be my best for them and they are always the best for me ...today I'm full of joy and praying for gentleness and grace with my littles, soft words and lots of praise, a glad heart and to QUIT worrying about my future!!!
That's all for now...

I Believe

 If you by chance were walking around our backyard, you might wouldn't recognize the signs that fairies...do indeed...live here. 

 Rocks carefully aligned and nestled in the grass, pools of water sprinkled with flowers, sticks bent and twisted and formed into small dwellings, little bitty pillows and scraps of fabric under bushes. 

 Brady asked me yesterday "Mom, so are fairies really real?"

 My answer? Rather cliche but "they are if you believe in them." 

 And she does...and I hope she does for a long time. I love the magic in Trinity, the belief she has that every occasion is a celebration. I love the way she dances in the grass, her golden hair glowing and her smile and smirks forever on her face. 

  She said to me earlier this week "Mama, this year when I turn six we will need to redecorate my room and get rid of my dolls." She had a brave look on her face. "Oh?" I answered "why would we do that?" She just looked at me like I hadn't a clue "because I'm gonna be big." I thought for a moment and then "hmmm, well you know that some girls like to play with dolls for a long time. If would like to get rid of some that would be fine but maybe lets wait until you are six and then see what you want to do. Besides, I played with dolls until I was at least nine." She looked relieved. 

 Plus, even though she loves her brothers a girl has to have girl things. Boys can be exhausting...or so she tells me. 

Blessed...

 Spring showers and watery crystals on blooms...

Fluffy pillows, a quiet place to sit and enjoy the morning sun, a handmade quilt at my back... 

 Corn muffins and afternoon tea, pretty china, hair swept back and freckled noses...

 Growing grass, blonde wispy hair, sleepy babies in the light...

 Three littles snug as bugs, soft blankets and white pillows, movie nights and popcorn...

 Fragrant geraniums, purple, a patio to sit and watch the birds...

 

One inspiring husband, four treasured littles , one loving Father...

I'm blessed.



Finnian Arrow

  Sweet sweet baby...where have you gone?

 Oh...you turned two. Still my baby, forever and always...looking more like a toddler then ever before. Your words are coming along, you babble constantly and bring just joy and delight with every gesture you make. You give your whole family a reason to giggle...we need the joy that you bring us so very badly. You are indeed a gift that might not have been....we love you so much. Happy birthday dear sweet Finn.

Calling for SPRING!!!!

  It feels a bit like time is standing still. The same thing just about everyday...us indoors waiting on spring. I wish I could say that I'm just thrilled to death with endless spring cleaning for a spring that doesn't come, and that I'm just full of creative things for my littles to do - but I'm not. I couple of trips to the dollar tree have helped...lots of coloring books and bead kits and watercolors - but I just want to shout it out "SPRING...Where the Heck are you?!!!"

  So, we wait...and we thread beads (great fine motor skill therapy right here at home)...and we bake...and we clean...and we read and do puzzles - and then out of nowhere...

 A glimpse

  And so with the glimpse i plow full speed ahead...I pack of up the boots and the coats, head down to Lowes for some potted plants...

   I hang some beautifuls in the trees and let the kids play barefoot once again. I shuffle through my coupons and find some great deals for Popsicles....I jump to summer and leave spring completely behind. I fill up the kiddie pool and let the kids skip rocks in it and wear their bathing suits just for fun. And then...

  It snows. Back inside and I rearrange every room in the house. The couch is moved, shelves are moved...I get rid of at least five boxes of "extras" I find. I change Zac and my room around...and change Brady's room - every room.

    That's better. I think what I long for the most is just the change - staying inside can feel cozy for a bit, comfortable. But after a bit, I loathe the grayish walls and the wood floors and long for bright blue skies and grass beneath my feet. I crave berries and watermelon and fresh water with lemon...I crave the smell of food on the grill and the scent of the grass after the sprinkler has been on for a bit.

   I guess waiting is a good time to grow ....

 But I think for me, the growing would be a lot less hindered if the kids were outside playing with dirt and discovering earthworms and blowing bubbles. Yep - I'm absolutely positive.

Precious

    I don't have words tonight...but I do have pictures. Not just any pictures...precious pictures. :)

  I mean, really? Yes they are real.

 Their eyes are real, their big blue eyes...their little red lips and sweet pink cheeks.

 I'm so glad they are mine.

Just Today

  Almost the end of March....almost Easter...almost Finn's first birthday...then Tristan's in June - sorry, i'm jumping ahead.
 Almost the end of March - this month has been crazy for our family but I think crazy good. Seven weeks down on our "special diet." Three weeks down of Zac's academy. Three weeks down of homeschooling ....Tristan's diagnosis behind us and our reality ahead of us, winter weather ALMOST past, lots of good things to come.

  We were blessed with several days that felt just like summer time. I was outside the ENTIRE day. I was upstairs at 8 am, coffee in hand...out the door I went and I didn't come in for a very long time. I found my rake and shovel and hoe and I got to work on our garden plot. I was turning soil when I let out a tremendous squeal and then reached beneath the soil and caught something in my hand. Then my kids heard it....my baby voice "isn't it SOOOO cute. Oh my goodness...." They came running over like I had found a little lost kitten...and saw instead two little earthworms in the palm of my hand. I can't help myself. I've just always loved earthworms. Trinity now does too.

  And this is a random picture from our sunny day where we only did...ahem...30 minutes of school. I think what Brady loves the most about being home is he doesn't have to wear a shirt - kid after my own heart (of COURSE I don't get away with it - but I always did long to be part of a hippy colony where clothes were optional. ) Trinity learns better with one shoe off....

  And then back to our warm day - even lunch was eaten outside. Finn is strange in the way that he doesn't enjoy fruit of any kind (unless it's baked in something) but he couldn't get enough of the guacamole and often he will chow down on kale and asparagus.

  Anyways, tomorrow it's suppose to snow. Today is slightly warm so the kids are all outside during their rest time because I just couldn't bring myself to making them be locked up in their rooms for the allotted "2 hour mandatory rest time." Sometimes when you're a mom you  just gotta give something up for the better good...you know?

  Yesterday I had my meeting with the Child Find team (they make up the IEPs for the *specials*) and after talking a lot about Tristan and his strengths and weaknesses they agreed with me that he shouldn't be in a typical preschool receiving occupational therapy and speech therapy but instead in a "center" where all of the teachers their specialize in special ed and have had lots of experience with kids with autism. I was also pleased to find out that the day is only 2 hours and 45 minutes. One of my concerns is that soon it would be spring and Tristan does best outside and I didn't want him locked up inside for 6 hours a day (I say it like I'm referring to prison and it's because I kind of feel like it is. :) Anyways, I was feeling really overwhelmed with having to make the decision to put him in preschool...but I really want him to have the speech therapy right now. After I found out that the days were less then 3 hours then I went ahead and gave them the "go" to place him.
 I was really overwhelmed yesterday AFTER the decision though because I realized I would have to take him to a pediatrician, I would need to go register him....I have to go next week to the eye doctor with Brady...I'm STILL trying to figure out a pediatrician to take Finn to to have his little surgery done - and I'm feeling quite alone in the childcare department. There are people I can ask (and I have) but I hate having to ask like every other day. Aubrey has been an amazing help to me...she has come over at least once a week to just help pass the day and three different times she watched the kids so I could take either Trinity or Brady out "one on one." My friend Amy has been a huge blessing letting Trinity join her littles at an art class on Tuesdays, and then a couple days ago she had a sleepover with Sophie. That was pretty much perfect because I was really overwhelmed and Brady was having a very hard day and our home wasn't particularly "happy." I was so glad that Trin has somewhere to escape and to play and build fairy houses and eat spaghetti and forget about stress for a moment. * side note : I had given Brady gluten for three days to see how it effected him and he was unable to focus, very aggravated and moody and the third day he had an upset stomach. I'm back on gluten free. *
 This morning I got a call from the lady over placing kids in preschool and she said that the centers are completely full so Tristan is on the roster to begin in the fall. Phew. I'm kind of glad that decision was made for me. I feel like I was open to him beginning but I'm pretty relieved that it's not the right time for now.

  It's been amazing to me how very busy these last few weeks have been and how little Zac and I have seen each other but how much we've grown. I feel like I've been able to really just call out to God in my time of need...and I've learned to say "I can't wash the laundry today" or "we're having sandwiches for dinner" and I've been okay with less then perfect. Also...I have felt closer to Zac even though he's farther away from me...even when he his home he is exhausted and very much focused on his homework and recooperating (which he should be) but I've felt very much a "part." I think it's because (and I say this as humbly as I can) but I've made it my point to be who he needs me to be right now, and not listen to that little voice that tells me what I "need." If you listen to your head it will tell you all kinds of foolish things "you deserve time off, go ahead and put yourself first" or "I've been working all day to, I'm not responsible to care about _ ." I do have to take care of myself - but I have to be obedient to God first and He tells me to take care of my home. So, in the grand scheme of things...it needs to be husband, children, then me. If there isn't time left for me....then there isn't. We'll see what I'm saying at the end of April... :) Anyways, that' what I've been learning and relearning and what I'm challenged with every day. It's also helped that Zac has left me love notes...give me big hugs when he comes home and thanks me for my effort. I feel very blessed to have him and so proud of how hard he is working. I'm pretty much attracted to hard workers. :)

  So, we are enjoying our weekends and trying to pack the most family time in that we can. Last weekend we roasted marshmallows at 10 am....snack right?

   I'm working my best at not focusing on the fact that Zac's academy is four months long. When I do I feel rather anxious - I'm doing my best to work on "today." It's hard though isn't it? Especially when in our busy lives we have to plan...we have to schedule time with friends, time to grocery shop, time to buy growing kids clothes...doctor's appointments - it's hard for me to have a schedule and then sit around and wait for it all to happen.

  But... Today we'll just drink tea and eat marshmallows (I made morning glory muffins this morning.) We will learn about Alaska and Columbia (my kids have VERY different taste) and we will draw pictures and play in baths and forget that the floor needs mopping AGAIN. We won't remind Finn that he's gonna be slightly uncomfortable in the next couple of weeks...and I won't think about how all four of our kids need clothes for spring. We will just play and learn...for today.

 And run around the yard in our undies...because tomorrow there will be snow (Sometime you have to plan.)