Aug 6, 2009

Looking for Answers

News here....basically none except that we are learning still to be a family of 5. I don't think Tristan has totally changed our way of living at all....I think he just happened along a time in life that is constantly changing due to the ages of our kids. They each are learning new things and experiencing new challenges everyday. Trinity is definitely a full blown toddler now but I still view her as my baby. She is SOOOO good at talking. If she's in the backseat of the car and she drops something she'll say "I drop it daddy." She mimics everything Brady does....sometimes cute and sometimes annoying as in "I'm so annoyed I want to run out into the yard and do laps" annoying.
Brady is still....Brady. He's very smart and very challenging. He's still sweet and funny, and still having meltdowns everyday. I'm beginning to research behavior disorders JUST because I have always thought that all it would take with a child is consistency and they would be fine. "Normal" toddlers after having a certain thing corrected every time they say something or do something disobedient would change it at least a little after 2 years. EVERYTHING is an issue with Brady and most things make him frustrated or very emotional and sad. Zac and I are feeling at a total loss right now as to how to help him because we have tried everything and not just tried...but consistently tried. Right now I am bidding on a book called Raising High Spirited Child and the back cover says exactly what we are going through....hopefully it will be a good read.
Sometimes I feel like this is all kind of my fault because when we had kids I took the whole "I know exactly what to do with my little kids....just consistently discipline and consistently love - keep them creative and active, involve them in what you are doing throughout your day. I have done this his whole life and it's not fixing any of his issues. I have joined a mothering Bible study...got tons of helpful advice...we have joined a study as a couple and had more good advice. I have prayed and prayed and prayed about my child and for my child and for us...so now this is my conclusion without seeing a doctor or professional of any kind - he has something a little abnormal and I need to try other things now to help him besides the "take away toys" or "spank" or "re do everything until you do it right."
After reading this book I also plan on reading a book on autism. I had no idea there were so many types of autism and some of them can even be controlled by diet. Whatever we do it will be the most "natural" route. I do not plan on medicating or labeling Brady but we could use some answers as to how to communicate better with our little boy. He needs help adjusting to change. ANY type of change. So, if you could keep us and our *search* in your prayers. These last few weeks have been especially challenging for us.

4 comments:

JLW said...

Okay, first, I'll be praying. Second, I have so much to say about this very same thing with our boys. I'll write it in an e-mail though, after we go to the beach! Praying though, first and foremost!

Grammy said...

Bless your heart! I know that's hard. We're praying and we love you more and more and we love Brady more than we can say!

CorleyAunt said...

A truly wise person knows they do not know it all, knows they cannot figure it all out on their own and prayerfully seeks answers. Sounds like to me you and Zac are being very wise!

MOM said...

You guys are wonderful God loving parents and I know that God will not fail you as you seek His will in how to best deal with each of your children. It sounds to me like you have bathed your parenting skills with prayer and now have some direction in which to proceed in how to help Brady. Diet truly does effect us more thatn most people are willing to admit. God has been faithful to help me realize some things that are especially harmful to me (especially ANY type of sweetener, not just sugar) and products containg yeasts or gluten. Be assured of my prayer support as you continue on by faith! I love you.

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